where is my ball
I can’t find my ball
finnick-lost-his-trousers-and:
england has the creator of the internet
england will always win
america has the creator of tumblr
america will always win
Errrm how are you going to use Tumblr with no Internet ???
Americans created the computer.
How do you use the internet without the computer?
i have a sandwich
But America invented electricity
we rule all
SUCK OUR FREEDOM FLAVORED DICKS
my face when Americans call chips “french fries”
my face when Americans call crisps “chips”
my face when Americans call lifts “elevators”
my face when Americans call chocolate globbernaughts “candy bars”
my face when Americans call merry fizzlebombs “fireworks”
my face when Americans call wunderbahboxes a “computer”
my face when Americans call meat water “gravy”
my face when Americans call electro-rope “power cables”
my face when Americans call beef wellington ensemble with lettuce a “burger”
my face when Americans call whimsy flimsy mark and scribblies “pens”
my face when Americans call twisting plankhandles “doorknobs”
my face when Americans call breaddystack a “sandwich”
my face when Americans call their hoghity toghity tippy typers “keyboards”
my face when Americans call nutty-gum and fruit spleggings “PB&J”
my face when Americans call an upsy stairsy an “escalator”
my face when Americans call a knittedy wittedy sheepity sleepity a “sweater”
my face when Americans call a rickity-pop a “gear shift”
my face when Americans call a choco chip bicky wicky a “cookie”
my face when Americans call peepee friction pleasure “sex”
my face when Americans call a pip pip gollywock a “screwdriver”
my face when Americans call a rooty tooty point-n-shooty a “gun”
my face when Americans call ceiling-bright a “lightbulb”
my face when Americans call blimpy bounce bounce a “ball”
my face when Americans call a slippery dippery long reppy a “snake”
my face when Americans call cobble-stone-clippity-clops “roads”
SO I MADE AN AWESOME HOUSE ON THE SIMS
AND I WAS REALLY FREAKING OUT LIKE WHY AREN’T THEY GOING IN DO THEY NOT LIKE THE HOUSE
AND THEN I REALIZED I DIDN’T ADD ANY DOORS
I AM THE STUPIDEST HUMAN BEING IN THE WORLD
Me on the phone: Yeah I’m going to be late to work today.
Supervisor: Why?
Me: There’s a cat gang bang happening on top of my car.
Supervisor: (silence)
Supervisor: Well can’t you break it up?
Me: Who am I to break up a cat gang bang? They’ve probably been organizing it for days on Craigslist.
Supervisor: Good point. See you when you get here.
